Depressed.
Author: Markman
Details
Maybe it’s not a good sign for the start of the week when you fall down the stairs and clog up the toilet. That’s how my Monday started this morning between the hours of 6 and 7 am. Luckily the fall wasn’t anything major (I was trying to avoid the cat at the base of the staircase) and the toilet wasn’t anything major apparently, so that’s good.
Did so much cooking last night while watching the Oscars and I also took to watching some program on John Gotti Jr. which I thought was pretty good. Did you know with the exception of some tiny parts of Thelma & Louise I have never watched a movie that had Brad Pitt in it. I actually can’t stand the guy. That’s not why I never watched any of them – it just happened to work out that way, but now I have to keep the streak alive. Never saw Fight Club? Nope. Seven? Nope. Oceans Eleven? Nope. Nada. None. I don’t think he’s that great to begin with – can’t act for beans in my opinion.
Sunny Saturday
Well, my chicken last night was a real hit! Yes, it was another Hello Fresh tryout but I found it pretty good. I also learned that a really good salad dressing is just lemon juice freshly squeezed from a lemon along with olive oil and that’s it. Tasted real good!
Today’s been kind of a boring day, instead of working on things I should be working on, I’m busy watching television such as the Lost Unabomber Tapes and catching up on A Million Little Things. As well as going to the local Wegman’s to get some stuff too so that took up some time as well. More later…
Wet Windy Friday
This morning started out with a visit to the dentist to get going on some procedures I need to get done and completed with a full set of new x-rays of my mouth. After that I prepared getting ready for what I’m making for dinner tonight – a little dish called Balsamic Fig Chicken with potatoes and mixed greens. Looks like a pretty simple recipe actually but that’s for later tonight….
Next, I’m working on some plans to do an overnight sometime up on Plum Island. Did it a couple years ago and it’s time to do it again – enjoyed ourselves there pretty much so it might be great to revisit. Maybe also check out the Pink ‘Spite’ House again. Speaking of that, I did pass by one in the North End of Boston last week,locally known also as the Skinny House. A spite house is a building constructed or substantially modified to irritate neighbors or any party with land stakes. Spite houses may create obstructions, such as blocking out light or blocking access to neighboring buildings, or can be flagrant symbols of defiance.

I then spent part of the afternoon going through and filing my taxes for last year. I decided to get through it all a bit early this year – now that’s that out of the way I can focus on other things.
Random thoughts: My amaryllis is down to it’s final bloom. I was pretty pleased overall with the way the plant did – to think I picked it up at a local supermarket. I’ve been reading some online articles about it and may attempt to get it to re-bloom next season, assuming I can keep the plant alive that long. We’ll see.
Also I need to be able to catch some breaks lately – plugging away but starting to get a little overwhelmed. It’s like two steps forward and one step back. However, I know I tend to jump to conclusions in my mind (maximizing worst case scenarios) that sometimes end up being way out of proportion, but after I sit with it for a while – I realize that that way of thinking was foolish and not helpful. Brains are weird. Hope that’s the case starting next week and that I’m freaking/bumming out for nothing. Until the next occasion which lately seems to happening all too frequently and all too quickly for my tastes and I do it all over again.
Things Afoot

This is shaping up to be the year of live music shows for me. On tap for us so far are the following:
- Def Leppard/Motley Crue/Poison/Joan Jett @ Fenway
- Bat Out of Hell Play (Meatloaf)
- Johnny Mathis ( something different for sure for my musical tastes)
- Bon Jovi/Bryan Adams in Jerz
- Damone (possibly, but I saw them last year)
The following shows I’ve entered contests to win tickets:
Hall & Oates(had entered to win tix but lost)- Goo Goo Dolls
- Guns n Roses
and maybe some more to come! Seems like a lot of acts are coming out of the woodwork this year.
Finally heard back from that other group. I need to set up a meeting sometime next week to see if I’d be a good fit and if so formally apply for the position (which is weird because I’ve been here so long already and that kind of work for over 10 years now), so not to jinx myself but hopefully things’ll turn out right in the end. I think I’ll need to format my resume though – I haven’t done that in so long!
Get Moving (working title)
I kinda like how this photo came out…
I was playing around with some of my older photos last night – maybe I’ll put one or two of them up. I also want to get going on filing my taxes soon.
Gametime: Bottom Feeder. I’m finding this game pretty challenging – but maybe it’s just me and my brain is has been turning to mush lately.
Paramount

Well this day has started out great so far – my external monitor at work just crapped the bed – luckily after about a half hour the IT dept was able to get me another one so that’s back in business. Just a hassle, you know?
But First…Coffee…
I think I drink too much coffee. I can’t help it, I feel sometimes as though I need it. I must be addicted to the caffeine I think. Usually I’ll have a cup a little bit after I wake up. I do this because it helps me to get started, it gets my cognitive functions going, so to speak. And I like the plain old coffee, none of that specialty flavored stuff. During the week I’ll also have 2 or three in the afternoon. And finally, once every two days or thereabouts I’ll have a cup in the late evening. It doesn’t affect my sleeping at all.
Today is the Superbowl but since the Pats aren’t in it, who cares? Not that I cared even when they were in it. Instead we’re going to hang out over another couples house and watch the Irishman. More later…
Boston Daze (updated)
I spent the day in town today so over the next few I’ll be posting various pics that I took around while hitting over 31,000 steps on my activity tracker. (That’s 13 miles of walking!)
I started by going through Downtown, through Faneuil Hall, , then up into the North End, over to the waterfront briefly, up to North Station, down along Fort Point, over to the Leather District, over to Copley around Trinity and the BPL and part of the Back Bay – basically all over. Why did I do this? Well, I had some free time and I was jonesin to capture some new content without any particular ideas of what I could see. Just being spontaneous and see what happens. I also wanted to see how far I could push my body – seems like 13 miles is pretty much the maximum I can walk in a day (and the weather wasn’t too bad!) – after that I start turning to mush.
This first pic above is from Faneuil Hall, and the statue is actually a giant size version of a former mayor of the city, as an exercise to the readers I’ll let you figure out which one.
After all that walking I met up with LD and we went out to an early dinner at a place we like in Braintree. Then it was back home, resting watching some 20/20.
I’m becoming ever more mindful of the layers of fragility at this uncertain time in history…
Speaking of watching, I was able to watch the first episode of Star Trek: Picard after all, as the powers that be have decided to place the episode up on YouTube to watch for free for a limited time, so if you want to catch it better hurry up quick. I must say that I am very impressed with what they’re doing. Two thumbs up from me – however I’m still not paying for CBS All Access. And speaking of sci-fi type stuff – did someone mess with the timeline because lately it feels like everything is a bit off from where it should be – for example, Kobe Bryant has passed; Prince Harry is leaving the monarchy; dinkweed is in the Oval Office; the world seems so divisive these days – just seems like something isn’t right. Did a Crisis on Infinite Earths or Back to the Future Part II actually happen? I’m becoming ever more mindful of the layers of fragility at this uncertain time in history…
Rise Above It All
I like the way this photo came out. I titled it “Rise Above” because of the buildings rising up into the sky surrounding the old State House into the morning fog, but also as I zoomed in, which I didn’t notice before, due to the window washers. I think what’s cool about this photo are the building details which you can see better as you zoom in – I find a certain kind of hidden beauty in that. Also the way I need to feel lately, so there’s that. Other themes that resonate with me as I look at this are the muted colors, the fog, things like that – relevant to how I’m feeling in a lot of ways these days.
Sun 1/26/20
Finally took down the Xmas tree today and stored it away for next season. Spent some time at the Sanctuary as well as hitting a couple of grocery stores in the afternoon. Did a bunch of cooking this afternoon as well. Sad news about Kobe. Tried to do a impromptu photo shoot with Carson. We did get this one which I thought was pretty good:
A Most Serene Saturday
What’s up with all the Aaron Hernandez specials on all of sudden?
Thoughts on the Hello Fresh – I did good on my first try although this particular recipe was very easy to prepare. Does seem like their ingredients are fresher than Blue Apron but that’s just my limited observation. Probably no different really.
Finally I did get a chance to see the David Harbour Hellboy movie this morning on HBO (I had DVR’ed it a while back). All in all, he’s good but I did prefer the Del Toro movies better. I guess it doesn’t matter since it didn’t do well at the box office so I suppose that’s the end of that.
Rest of the day is pretty much just taking it easy. Reading, napping, chores, etc. Might update this post more later…
Appointment Day
Lots of appointments filling out today. I had a dental appt early in the morning with a followup in two weeks and then LD had some stuff. Carson had a vet visit as well. That was a bit of trauma getting him in the carrier at first – but he did good while he was there. He was so scared he actually let out a little poop while en route – which actually was advantageous as it was used as his stool sample. Good job Carson! We also did get to check out a cute cafe in Lincoln as well since we were in the area (the Twisted Tree Cafe). In case you were wondering I had a pretty good turkey sandwich.
This seems to be the year of seeing concerts – got a whole bunch of musical acts to see this year. Might see Bon Jovi again (not sure why his prices are so high, he ain’t THAT good – just my opinion), and entered a contest for front row Billy Joel seats at Fenway along with a meet and greet after the show through SiriusXM – hey you never know. Can”t win if you don’t try although I know my odds on that one are pretty slim. This all goes along with acts I plan to see this like Def Leppard, Poison, Mötley Crüe and Joan Jett (granted all those are on the same bill) as well as Johnny Mathis, possibly Damone again and maybe Lita Ford or some such, who knows. Maybe even the Harp Twins. Might be getting tougher and tougher to see local acts these days as the old Middle East is up for sale though admittedly I haven’t done that in quite some time – age and all.
Wish I had CBS All Access – I want to see the new Picard show – heard good things, but I’m too cheap to buy the streaming service for one show. Anyone wanna invite me to a watch party? Heheh!Another show I’m looking forward to Forensic Files II! Wonder if it’ll be as good as the originals – I noticed it even has the same opening theme music!
Got a free shipment of Hello Fresh to try this weekend (friend that uses them got an offer to send a free shipment to us try them out) – we’ll see how it goes (haven’t done any of these things since the Blue Apron days, which we did for a while but quit a couple of years ago). I’m doing the cooking tonight! What else? Still keeping my amaryllis and European Tree going strong, so that’s good. Filled up the bird feeder outside as it was empty – I haven’t really done any birding in a while. Might have to get out there and try some again.
Two Steps Back
(Work crap story here) I’m still hearing flack about a mix up I was involved in a couple weeks back and now everyone’s in a snit about. Yes, I had a misunderstanding about a task whereas they just wanted to know how long it would take to do something but I took it as how long would it take, told them and they said great, and went ahead and did it although I wasn’t supposed to. Why ask if you’re not going to do anything!? Looking back at it now I can see it could be read two ways in the way it was asked. I was a bit zealous in my search to find stuff that I might have jumped the gun a bit on that, but if the pressure wasn’t so high in the first place maybe it would have never happened? Oh well. So now they are crying over budget (again) and they want to win the re compete for this project which is coming up (not sure how my involvement would change any of that, wouldn’t you just eat it and not place things like that in a proposal? Plus I’ve learned you can have a great proposal and be cheaper than the competition and still lose – that’s why I’m in this mess in the first place) and want me to move it to overhead, but that freaks my manager out because it will ruin the utilization numbers for the month of the group because for some reason they’ll all agog about having the numbers look good for January (they just recently reorganized again – seems to happen every 18 months or so since I’ve started working in this business). Same old story I’ve heard a million times before. Gets old real fast.
Well, I can’t change the past. It is what it was. Makes me think they’re concerned about profitability (as usual – I get it, but geez), I think a bunch of folks are on the light side, not just me, and that is not a good sign. The business is somewhat cyclical – it gets busy and then there are lulls – I believe we are in somewhat of a lull at the moment, maybe if they could win some projects things would reflect better what they are trying to achieve. I’ve been able to find some things on my own here and there but it’d be good to get something solid. Meanwhile the place goes ahead and buys another company and is building a huge ass headquarters for millions that won’t be done for two years (got money for that though), yet they worry about one week of my part time work bringing down the house. Oh, and nobody cares for the stupid open office concept either – it’s so 2002. Anyways I haven’t heard as of yet what the final outcome will be or what they want me to do with the time I used. A good part of me really doesn’t give a fuck. I’m finding myself getting really tired of this same old story and it makes me want to break free and try something new, but the other side is I need the job and where am I going to find something equatable as what I have now? Crazy to believe in September I’ll be 30 years in. (Not that that seems to matter any – I think my manager was in high school while I was putting out reports).
Then I try to figure out if I could just retire now. Total pipe dream – I can’t but it would be nice. Another 13 years at least of this shit!? Feels good to vent though. I’m open to possibilities if you know of any. I could happily be a lovely assistant to someone. Another pipe dream.
But there is something to look forward to. I’m going to see Def Leppard and friends at Fenway park late this summer with LD and a friend coming up from Jerz. Thanks LD!
Today’s Gametime: Wiz!
Fort Point Revisited

Going through some of my older photos and stumbled upon this one I took along the Fort Point Channel in Boston, since I don’t have any new shots right now. Looked sort of cool so I figured I’d share it now. I find I don’t seem to take many shots in the winter, compared to the summer months when I take hundreds. That red building in the center which is obscured partially by the bridge is actually the Tea Party museum where the tea dropping happened back in the day.
Latest observation: Carson gets more deliveries than any of us, with all his various toys! He does seem to enjoy playing with them.
Sunday 1/19/20
Started the day by cleaning up the snow that fell last night. It was the kind of snow that’s easy to deal with so I was done fairly quickly, cleaning up the driveway and walkways. Nice that the sun was out today and melted a bunch of it as well. Well, actually that’s not true, before shoveling I finished some books I had been reading, I also got a massage yesterday so I was ready to go. Feeling the sun out there today does make me wish Spring was here already, I want get started on my plantings. It’ll be here before I know it, but I want it to come now!
I was able to (finally!) finish all 7 seven levels of Full Circle as well as this game, Escape the Void, which is similar. I’ll keep at these things until I beat them – it’s kind of obsession with me.
I ended up going to the grocery store this afternoon to get some needed things. Isn’t that so exciting to read about? So what did we do with the groceries I got? We made Instant Pot Chicken Pot Pie (can someone invent skinless potatoes already? Peeling them is annoying). I enjoy doing the prep work though, cutting the carrots and mincing the garlic, etc. etc. Also helped assist with a tofu dish for LD. Spent the later evening watching a thing on Aaron Hernandez and the SAG awards show, which I found kind of boring but LD didn’t want to watch the remake of Hellboy. Can’t imagine why!
Braving the Cold

I went and got a much needed haircut early this morning. I find early Friday mornings are the best time to go to this particular barbershop because it isn’t too busy and I can get in and out really quick. Also, I’ve noticed that barbershops (or most of them) are all pretty hip these days with young men doing the work. Not the barbershop scene I remember growing up as a kid.
Carson meanwhile continues to amaze. He really likes this fake mouse at the end of a string toy, so we play a lot with him using it as it seems to be his favorite. He’s like a dog. He actually will play fetch with it. Apparently this morning while I was the barbershop he took the mouse, carried it all the way up the stairs into the bedroom, and dropped in in the bed next to LD! What a character this cat is!
Work is work. Trying to find pieces here and there. What’s really annoying is that we noticed a job posting in the company looking for the work that I am totally qualified and AM doing! But for some wacko reason I can’t work with them unless I switch into their group (but they’d essentially have to ‘hire’ me even though I already work at the company – actually it makes no sense). We’ll see if they want to pop on me, although it’s dumb to me that the resources are already there but do to most likely financial setups we can’t just work together. The fact that I haven’t heard anything from them doesn’t make me feel confident but I’ll give it some time and see.
This afternoon I decided to brave the cold and check out the big Tut statue down at Boston city hall, since it’s only there for a few more days and I’m not sure I’d get another opportunity to see this thing. Like I said before, I have a thing for ancient Egyptian stuff.
Ended up going to a restaurant for an early dinner, Venezia’s down by the Boston/Quincy waterfront. Hadn’t done that in quite some time, it was nice.
Also as for gametime these days:
Goat in the Cave – help the goat survive and get out. I was able to complete all the levels.
As for Tasty Jewel looks like Level 92 is far as I’m going to get. I think I’ve annoyed LD playing this game long enough now.
Full Circle is a good puzzle game, but alas, I cannot for the life of me seem to be able to solve level 6. There are 7 levels total. When I get trapped like this it makes me nuts! I must solve the puzzle! But how?



















